INTHEBLACK February 2023 - Magazine - Page 42
F E AT U R E
“Love bombers don’t like boundaries. They
only like their own boundaries. They have built
an image of themselves that, in many cases, is
based on perception rather than reality.”
JON MICHAIL, IMAGE GROUP INTERNATIONAL
Perhaps the victim asked to take leave or
challenged the love bomber by disagreeing
with their opinion – this can be enough for a
drastic change in behaviour.
“Another sign is when you are not telling
people what is going on,” says Slocombe.
“Often people start to recognise that it’s not
healthy, and they almost feel a bit embarrassed.
42 INTHEBLACK February 2023
A good strategy is not to keep your feelings of
discomfort a secret. It takes a lot of courage,
but it will take the shame out of it.”
If the victim thinks they have contributed
to the grooming phase – even by something
as benign as responding to a text message
that complimented them – this can
exacerbate feelings of shame. It may make
them reluctant to tell anyone else, because
they see themselves as partly responsible.
“It puts them in an untenable situation,
which is often when depression starts to
kick in,” says Slocombe.
FIGHTING BACK
Jon Michail, group CEO of Image Group
International, has seen love bombing destroy
self-esteem and trigger mental health issues
such as anxiety and depression.